Backwards Sleeping=Sick?

So these past few days, when my sleeps been all sorts of out-of-whack, I've felt like shit. And I'm really beginning to think there's a connection. So, just another piece of incentive to get that straightened around.

Been up for 15 hours straight as of right now. And I don't think I can hold out much longer. D: Between the dust making me sneeze like crazy and giving me a headache, the nauseated feeling, and the aches; it's really hard to want to stay awake. Bleh.

I could try playing more Rumble Fighter, but I'm kinda sick of being hit on. Because it's so rare to find girls playing a fighting game, especially since most girls will pick a guy character anyways, my pixels get hit on... A LOT. And seriously, that's all they know, are my pixels. It's pretty dumb. But hey, sometimes it gets me free gifts and teammates that will die to save my ass. Ahahaha, so that's good. xD But aside from that it really is a fun game and I enjoy playing. Slowly but surely, I'm getting REALLY good at it too, and climbing up the ranks. YAY! My one friend Brendan seems to hate it though because he's not good at it yet and all he does is bitch about the game or the team set up.

Seriously, it's a game. And if a game ceases to be fun, stop playing. I started out EXACTLY where he is. Getting my ass handed to me by my friends that were A LOT stronger and more experienced than me. So you know what I did? I went to play others on my level, got better, and learned. And then the next time I played my friends we were a bit more even. I still get my ass handed to me by them, but it's getting closer and closer and soon I think I'll be handing their asses to them.

So I don't know what's up with Brendan. Because you gotta play to get better, and if you can't have fun with your friends... well... you're screwed.

But enough about that.

Today I spent close to TWO HOURS folding, sorting, and putting away clothes. Yuck. I never want to fold clothes again. And my dresser is stuffed now too, and Mom has MORE CLOTHES of mine in the basement. >.<;;; Those bitches can STAY down there. Oi. @@;

Also, it is my friend Kizzy-chan is celebrating her 19th birthday today! Had to mention it because even though we live on opposite sides of the country we're really close friends. And someday, I'll get out there to meet her in person, along with Mouse, Vos, Resa, and maybe Hicchu and Niaro. Oh, and Melanie too, who is a fellow photographer.

Geezus... so many people in California... LMAO

Anywho, I'll end this with the necklace I made Kizzy. I am off... to nap or something. ._.;;


Kizzy's Necklace by *Saknika on deviantART

And so...

Well, after applying to:
-PetSmart
-Staples
-ACMoore
-Hall of Springs
-JCPenny Portraits
-Lifetouch Studios
-Two random studios on CriagsList
-Sears Portrait Studio
-Borders

I finally got ONE phone call back.

So, as of two days ago? Yeah, Thursday, I have an interview at Sears Portrait Studio. Monday, 2pm. FINALLY. You'd think it was a crime to get a job lately with how difficult that was.

Granted, it's not my idea of a prime job in photography; but at least it's in photography, and it'll be some form of income. Now all I have to do is nail the interview and get my ass hired. Oh boy.

On the flip side, I'm still working on my room. We're down to folding clothes and the last few large things though, so not too much is left. I just REALLY hate to fold clothes. :P

I was gonna go out and do photos of the full moon over the water behind mountains at about 4am today, but that fell through thanks to RAIN. D: And it was probably a stupid idea anyway considering it was 4am, and I would have been alone.

My sleeping is all sorts of SCREWED UP. I have trouble remembering what day it is and what happened when because of it. Thursday I slept from 1:30pm-9:30pm, and yesterday I slept from 2:30pm to 10:30pm, and I haven't gone back to bed since. But I think I'm going to crash soon and hope I get flipped back around. *crosses fingers*

I also have a senior portrait booked for Tuesday! HUZZAH!

And speaking of HUZZAH, I met my FAVOURITE COMIC ARTIST EVER in a LIVE VOICE CHAT on Wednesday at 8pm! Lora Innes of The Dreamer is an AMAZING writer and artist, and I am SO IN LOVE with her comic it's insane. I plan on stalking the comic store soon enough to buy it, because she just got a printing offer that was WELL DESERVED. Of course, I already have one of the limited edition Issue One teasers, so I'm happy. And I bought this print as well, because it's so amazing. So seriously, check her out. It's worth your time. And, should you be so inclined... buy me her stuff? xD I kid... maybe >.>

Anyways, I'm out. Either to sleep or clean! Ciao!

Oh yeah... and... last one from the shoot x'D


Senior Profile by *Saknika on deviantART

It Happened on July 24th...

Okay, before you say ANYTHING... I was talking with someone and saved the conversation so I have the exact date. LMAO And I saved that conversation FOR THIS VERY REASON.

TO BLOG IT.

Now, I'm sure you're wondering WHY I have to blog about something on the 24th, so let me clue you in.

On the 24th, weird things started happening AGAIN. Now, I'm totally used to this in my life, but it's fairly rare lately, and it certainly didn't happen often to Mousey. And Mousey is a friend of mine in California that I met online.

So let me explain.

Throughout my life, I've always been fascinated by ghosts, spirits, and the supernatural. I suppose it's why I study religions and fairy tales and am not overly religious myself. And with this fascination, I've found that if you open your mind to it, you can kinda open yourself up to actually experience it. Or maybe I'm just naturally in tune with it, I don't know. I do know that I've seen and heard and had a lot of unexplainable things happen to me though.

In my house, I've heard voices in the basement when waking up in the middle of the night. And I'm not alone in that, because my sister has heard them too. They're very audible, and I definitely was NOT sleeping. But it wasn't just voices, it was movement too.

My woods out back are the creepy silent type, where no animals make any sounds. The kind from horror movies, and they kind of remind you of that when you go in them too. The swamps don't help that much. But the trees don't grow right back there. Plant cells are very rigid, and as such grow in a linear fashion. These trees grow in beautiful curves a lot of the time. It just doesn't belong.

Up the road from us is an old abandoned graveyard. Actually, I know of at least two in town. Anyways, the ghosts in this place have been incredibly restless ever since the fence was stolen around the perimeter. To the point that sometimes you don't even want to drive down that seasonal road because there's such a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach. I've been in it during the day and at night (hell, went on Halloween once >.>), and I can tell you there's definitely a lot of activity there. Well, one of my friends did actually remove a piece of gravestone about... five years ago? She has since returned it, but the night she took it was my 15th birthday party, and she and my other friend and I were going to sleep out in the camper in the yard. There is this one corner it always leaked in then, and of course the night had to be stormy and rainy. Well, whatever she brought back with that piece of stone (we're going for poltergeist) was not happy. That leak FOLLOWED her around. And in the morning, she had a slight concussion even though at no point in time did she ever hit her head. And while I was asleep, I remember waking up because I felt hands on me, but there was NO ONE near me at all because I'd removed myself to the dinette bed in order to cool off from heat sickness. She does miss her friend though, she had that small chunk of broken gravestone for at least three years.

And before anyone screams thief or vandalism, mind you, this gravestone was already shattered and destroyed, no one even cares about tending to this graveyard unless they desperate for community service like the Boy Scouts, and the little chunk she had fit in her hand. We didn't break the gravestone, and by no means did anyone care. And, as I already said, it has long since been returned.

Anyways, onward...

Remember those woods? There was a night once in the 9th grade when my friend Tabby was over, and it was the lunar eclipse. We were both outside on a low porch roof (no longer exists due to putting an addition on) watching it, and we both got this feeling that we needed to get back inside. I will NEVER forget that night. I can't tell you what it was, or why, but I can tell you we were scared. It was late, after everyone had gone to bed, and we barricaded ourselves in my room and stayed out of sight of the window kind of scary. Because all you could hear, on all my walls and in my closet, was scratching. Like claws on wood. And it was ALL OVER. Somehow they couldn't get into my room, but we were wide awake and it was not cool. You can believe me or not, but I swear on my grandmother's grave I'm not lying. And being that we both liked to mess in areas we probably shouldn't, it wouldn't shock me if there were more than a few angry spirits with me.

Up the road a ways is an abandoned infirmary. It was an orphanage, a TB Sanitarium, and rumour has it an asylum, but that's probably just rumour. But it IS incredibly haunted, and with the permission of the caretakers I have been in there. A lot. Both during the day and at night. And I'm going to tell you this... DO NOT GO IN ALONE. Not only because the building has a lot of structural issues (holes in the floor, roof that will not hold you, asbestos...), but because of the spiritual activity. Down in the basement, there is what's known as the "Dark Hallway". Now, there is light all around said hallway, but because there are no windows in the actual thing, the only light you will get is from the surrounding rooms. But entering it is like entering another dimension. It's just a wall of black SO DARK you can't see your finger even if you were about to poke yourself in the eye with it. And no light from the two rooms it connects gets in. And when you enter, you can hear the screams of the ghosts of the dead that used to be carried out through it. It's not a safe hallway though, since one wall has collapsed in from the pressure of the earth outside. If you go through with a flashlight you can see, but the first time I went through was with no light at all and I was TERRIFIED. Up in the library, I have had books thrown at me by what appears to be nothing there. And one of my friends has a photo we took looking up into that room, and quite visibly are two very red and very angry eyes in it. The gurney is constantly moving not just rooms, but FLOORS, and this thing is SO RUSTY that it shouldn't be possible. Not with how destroyed this place is. The last few times I was in though, we couldn't locate it. At all. And there's no way it was stolen, because you can't get it out the windows you have to climb in if you're not going in with permission, and then after that there's no way you'd get it out the fence. So we really have NO IDEA where it went. Doors will slam of no accord in there as well, and then open back up. It's insane. And many people will tell you that driving by there at night, they've seen blue lights in the windows, or their cell phones suddenly loose service, and all sorts of odd things. It was once a beautiful building, too, but too many kids have vandalized it. I'd like to restore it someday though... And outback, before I forget, the incinerators still sit.

But, that's not all. I've been in plenty of other old abandoned places ranging from barns to houses to churches and factories.

In my dreams, I see things. Premonitions, if you will, because they tend to come true if/when I have them. I do tarot readings that are 90% accurate and have predicted the death of my cat with them. I'm into it all.

At my grandmother's, both my sister and I were terrified to sleep in the upstairs bedroom, and it felt like if we did we would die. When we did sleep, all we could dream about were out parents dying on the trip back home to come get us. And the Virgin Mary statue up on the bureau was constantly shaking and rattling at night it seemed. Like something was trying to get rid of it. And we did tell my grandmother, and she told us not to worry because that statue was blessed. Well, I can believe it, because whatever it was never was able to harm us, and never did succeed in breaking that statue. But I have not slept in that room ever since.

In one of the graveyards I like to go to, first when with a large group we could hear something following us and we were sure we were the only ones there, and we could hear banshee like screams. More than one person, myself included, felt randomly sick and fatigued in there. And when we left, there was a bird that had been SHOVED through the fence, because there's no way in hell it could have flown that forcefully into it and killed itself, let alone in the position it was in. The second time with just two other friends, we were walking along when Tabby told us to stop and turn off the flashlights and look back. Well, there were three of us... but FOUR human shadows. I tried to get a picture, but I didn't have time to use my tripod (time is of the essence when you needed to get someone home on time), and flash kills shadows. So you'll have to take me at my word. It was CREEPY to say the least.

And at my apartment in Massachusetts, there was a ghost that loved to rattle the pipes. And from what I heard from my upstairs neighbor, pee on the bathroom walls as well. Most of the tenants and a good chunk of people in town would tell you that building was haunted, too. I tended to sleep with a light on for good reason, but never anything more than something small as a night light.

So why did I tell you all that? Well, to tell you this of course!

July 24th, while home alone house and pet sitting, my microwave for the second time in its life in this home went AWOL. It was turning itself on and running both the cooking and defrost functions. I had to go out to turn it off. And I was on mic with Mousey at the time, on PalTalk, and she was getting scared too. But we turned the mics off by unplugging them from our computers because they weren't working properly and cutting out so bad that it wasn't worth it. And I was totally channeling something that night, because my emotions wouldn't stay stable at all.

So about every hour I was going to turn off the microwave, waiting for 7am when I could call my parents up at camp to find out about where in the back the plug was, because I couldn't find it as dumb as that is. And as it was I needed to climb up onto the counter to reach it, which might be why, and I did cut myself trying to get this plug out.

But what was freaky, was how the little green box around my avatar kept lighting up on PalTalk to signal sound coming from my side of the chat, even though there was no way sound could get through because there were no mics plugged in AT ALL.

And then we decided to disable audio when Mousey audibly heard a scream of terror and anguish from a girl come out her speakers from me, with no mics plugged in. NOT COOL.

Daylight never looked so good that day, I swear. oo;;; My cats would not stop laying in front of my bedroom door, either, as if they didn't want me to leave, or they didn't want something to get in.

So chalk it up to paranoia or whatever you want, I'm standing behind what I've seen, heard, and experienced. And... I'm going with spiritual activity.

Cleaning, cleaning, cleaning, and MORE CLEANING

Okay, so basically I feel like my own personal maid lately. All I've been doing for about a week straight now, is clean. AND I'M NOT DONE YET! ;_; Holy crap... it's insane. oo;;; I mean, yeah, I've been SUPER ORGANIZING as I go, but this is ridiculous. I've thrown out five bags of trash, and will probably toss another three or four at this rate, and have almost filled my second large box to go to the Salvation Army. I told my parents we just needed to get a dumpster, but as you can see, that hasn't gone very far... because we don't have one. x'D I'm sure the garbage men just LOVE US lately. LMAO

On the other side of the fence... I'm still a jobless bum. v_v;;; Been searching and applying like, EVERYWHERE, but so far no go. I am still working on getting my photography up off the ground though, and I have at least one paying client for a Senior Portrait. IT'S A START. And my friend Karen, whose family portrait I did outdoors for my portfolio, is getting me into her school's PTSA newsletter. So that will be 500+ people coverage. And being that it's the first issue, there won't be too many people in it and a lot of people will see my ad. WHOO! THANK YOU SO MUCH KAREN IF YOU'RE READING THIS!

So maybe, just maybe, I'll land a few jobs from that. :3 I'm not overly hopeful that I'll get a lot since it's so late in the game, but hey, you never know. xD

That's about it though... A lot of cleaning, a lot of mental break downs over upcoming bills, a lot of job hunting... and a lot of wishing I slept for more hours.

Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy

Man, been a while since I updated, hasn't it? >.< So I'll have a lot to catchup on... later. Right now, and as I have been doing for the past THREE DAYS, I'm cleaning my room while job hunting via the internet. So far I haven't heard anything, but we'll see. It's come to the point that I'll take anything and just do my photography on the side, because bills are coming and I gotta pay 'em. God the economy sucks. v_v;;;

On the plus side, I am doing at least two senior portraits for people soon, and a friend of mine is getting my business card into the first issue of her PTSA's newsletter, so I'll get a lot of coverage that way. So that might help to bring some revenue in. Just gotta remember to go see Tom Mills about the tax thing. Oi.

Cleaning wise, I'm getting there. My room was an absolute disaster, so it's been taking a while. I can't wait for it to be done though, because I can't stand the mess any longer!!! Well, that and I want to be able to hang some more shelves of sorts (aka my crate stand is going on my wall so I can bring up a second nightstand) to hold books and stuff. Because... I have a lot. x'D

Of course, I'm in hardcore mode, so as I go I tear apart drawers and stuff and clean them out. And I'll be doing more of that when I'm done cleaning too, just because. So far I have at least three or four boxes that are going to the Salvation Army and/or City Mission of things I don't need/want that others might. I've already hauled three garbage bags out of here too, and I'm on my fourth. So my room is being MASSIVELY overhauled. And I tend to do this every single time I clean. But I really have to this time, considering I still have stuff in the basement to bring up. ^^;

And speaking of the basement, I'm gonna be going down there with my Mom soon to help clean THAT up so I can have my little corner for studio space near the door. Right now it's the best I can do, so I'm going to make it look nice. Probably get a throw rug or something, since the floor is nasty concrete. And when I say nasty, I mean stained with building materials nasty. >.<;;; Eventually it's going to be a family room, but right now it's just a storage area and work station while we finish remodeling the rest of the house. Which we've been doing for two years now because my brother and sister can't keep their rooms clean long enough to get them finished and stuff. Ugh.

But yeah, I'm going to set up shop down in my basement. And you know what's really cool? I totally traded my Mamiya in for almost $3,000 worth of a light kit, so I really can do that! I only have two lights, but those will do for now. I can make do with the background. Eventually I'll get a third light. ^^ And more Pocket Wizards! LMAO

Anyways, things are starting to move forward for me. I'm dreading bills and stuff, but maybe, just maybe, things will work out. *crosses fingers* I'm hoping so.

And if you're lucky, I'll stop being lazy and blog more. xD


Senior Portrait: First Attempt by *Saknika on deviantART

It's Going Around

That nasty bug that's going around? Yup, I think I've got it. Every time I've eaten today, I've suddenly felt nauseated. And my brother was vomiting this morning. And now, I have a fever. And I feel super run down. And just... blah. I hate this. Don't want it at all. I don't want to be sick! D: I have a grad party coming up, and I need to go do stuff tomorrow. v_v;;;

In the mean time though, I have the Gaia Rejected Olympics to keep me occupied, and a light kit waiting to be set up and used once I'm not feeling like I'm going to loose my innards. @x@;;;

A Visitor from the Past

I may not agree with all views in this, but I do support the message this video is sending. America is no longer as free as it once was. As patriotic as I can be, I am angry at the government. Watch, listen, and try to understand.

One More Thing

If you have something to say to me, especially if it's negative, you better include a name other than "Anonymous", because I'm not publishing it otherwise. Hide behind that name all you want, but remember, there is a law in effect that states "It is illegal to abuse and harass someone on the internet anonymously".

And another thing. If you don't like what I have to say, you can chose not to read my blog. Freedom of speech.

So to those of you who send me anonymous comments that are not productive, nor kind, nor serve any purpose other than to be an ass, can go away. Nothing says you have to read my blog, and nothing says you have to agree with me.

This is my opinion, my life, and my words (generally). So deal or leave.

Hello Higher Gas Prices

This whole article pissed me off in the first paragraph. Gotta hand it to Hilary though, for once, tax the shit outta the oil companies profits, not us. I totally agree. Fuck you Republicans, and your shitty idea to back oil, because it sucks. Damn straight we're not buying as much gas! What do you want us to do!? People can barely afford to feed their families, let alone drive! So fuck you, and go die in a ditch. You're putting American into economic hell. We're just trying to survive. And know what? The roads have always sucked out where I am. The highways are fine. Major roadways are fine. Just because you pansy-assed city drivers can't handle a little pot hole does not mean anything. Maintain to the minimum and I bet you see those costs drop. We don't have to repave every year, and contrary to popular believe, dirt is drivable. Even in two wheel drive, with a little car. Believe me, because I do it.

All right, enough with my rant, here's the whole article. Copy-pasted off the Roadrunner website.

---------------------------------

Dream of gas tax holiday falters over job losses
Published- July 20 2008 7:29AM EDT | AP
By JIM ABRAMS - Associated Press Writer

WASHINGTON(AP) The political vision of a summer gas tax holiday died a quick death in Congress, losing to a view that federal excise taxes on gasoline and diesel fuel will have to go up if they go anywhere.

Despite calls from the presidential campaign trail for a Memorial Day-to-Labor Day tax freeze, lawmakers quickly concluded _ with a prod from the construction industry _ that having $9 billion less to spend on highways could create a pre-election specter of thousands of lost jobs.

Now, lawmakers quietly are talking about raising fuel taxes by a dime from the current 18.4 cents a gallon on gasoline and 24.3 cents on diesel fuel.

With gas prices setting records daily, Republican presidential hopeful John McCain and former Democratic candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton called for a 90-day suspension of the federal fuel tax to give drivers a little relief at the pump. The fuel taxes go into the Highway Trust Fund, which is used for road construction and repair and mass transit.

Clinton suggested making up for the loss by imposing a windfall profit tax on oil companies, an idea that Republicans rejected. McCain said the money could come out of the general Treasury fund, in effect adding to the federal deficit, and is still getting mileage from the idea.

"Some economists don't think much of my gas tax holiday," he said in a speech this month. "But the American people like it, and so do small business owners."

Barack Obama, the likely Democratic nominee, opposed the idea from the beginning and the White House gave it a cold shoulder. Depriving the 52-year-old Highway Trust Fund of $9 billion at a time when it is heading into the red doomed the notion of a gas tax holiday in Congress.

The chairman of the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, Rep. James Oberstar, and the chairman of the highway subcommittee, Rep. Peter DeFazio, presented fellow lawmakers with a list of how many jobs and how much money each state would lose. It ranged from $30 million and 1,000 jobs in Vermont to $664 million and 23,000 jobs in California.

"Because the trust fund is already looking at a looming shortfall, it would have moved project cancellations into the construction season," DeFazio, D-Ore., said in an interview. He said it was "highly unlikely" that oil companies would have passed savings along to consumers.

Just three years ago, that trust fund enjoyed a surplus of $10 billion. Even without a tax freeze, the fund is projected to finish 2009 with a deficit of $3 billion. That that could grow as Americans drive less and buy less gas because of higher pump prices.

The consequence is that only about $27 billion in federal money will be available next year to states and local governments for new infrastructure investment even though the current highway act calls for spending $41 billion a year. For many, the solution is to raise rather than suspend or cut federal fuel taxes, which haven't changed since 1993.

The Transportation Construction Coalition, a group of industry companies and unions, said that if Congress does not do something about the shortfall, states will lose about one-third of their road and bridge money in the budget year starting Oct. 1. That would put 485,000 more jobs at risk.

That message carried the day this summer. But now Congress has the bigger task of dealing with the short-term deficit crisis in the fund and coming up with a new spending plan, including revisiting the gas tax issue, when the current six-year, $286 billion highway-transit act expires in September 2009.

Senate Democrats in May tried to add $5 billion to an aviation overhaul bill to replenish the highway trust fund next year; Republicans objected. Democrats tried again in June, but this time for $8 billion; Republicans objected to that, too.

Congress should first reduce spending on pet projects, known as earmarks, argued Sen. Jim DeMint, R-S.C. "I'm not going to let the Senate spend all this money when nobody is looking, especially when we refuse to stop wasting billions of taxpayer dollars on earmarks."

Oberstar, D-Minn., said his committee is working on the next long-term highway bill. He estimated it will take between $450 billion and $500 billion over six years to address safety and congestion issues with highways, bridges and transit systems.

"We'll put all things on the table," Oberstar said, but the gas tax "is the cornerstone. Nothing else will work without the underpinning of the higher user fee gas tax."

At the very least, the gas tax should be indexed to construction cost inflation, DeFazio said.

The nonpartisan National Surface Transportation Policy and Revenue Study Commission concluded in a report this year that the U.S. needs to spend $225 billion annually over the next 50 years to create a highway and transit system capable of sustaining strong economic growth. Current spending, at federal, state and local levels, is about $90 billion a year.

Among other revenue-raising possibilities, the commission recommended gradually increasing the current federal fuel taxes to 40 cents a gallon.

The American Road & Transportation Builders Association is calling for a 10-cent-a-gallon raise and indexing the tax to inflation. With construction costs soaring because of competition for building materials from China and other developing nations, the tax rate would have to be about 29 cents a gallon to achieve the same purchasing power as the 18.4-cent rate imposed in 1993, the association says.

Including state and local levies, people in the U.S. pay about 47 cents on average in taxes for a gallon of gasoline. Fuel in many European countries costs $8 to $9 a gallon, with half or more of that going to taxes.

Other ideas that will be on the table when lawmakers write a bill next year including more toll roads and public-private partnerships, congestion pricing and user fees where drivers pay a tax based on how many miles they drive.

___

On the Net:

American Road & Transportation Builders Association: http://www.artba.org

-----------------------------

So there you have it. I. AM. PISSED.

Rained Out

My fireworks pretty much got rained out. And then I went and got fast food with Dad, and it appears that I can't even eat Wendy's anymore. Which is sad, because that means no more fast food for me. Goodbye basic teenage staple. :( So yeah, I'm sick as hell right now, but since I can't sleep I might as well blog.

I finished Ceres: Celestial Legend tonight. To all you manga fans out there... AMAZING STORY. READ IT. READ IT NOW!

I've got more busy days coming up too. Besides trying to find a job, I'm looking at:

Parents leave for camp Sunday (20th)
Tuesday (22nd) My sister returns from Europe.
Saturday (26th) I have a graduation party to attend.
And Friday (1st) is Conneticon.
Then Saturday (2nd) I'm going to see an Indian Pow Wow.
And Sunday (3rd) my parents return from camp.

And during all this I also want to:
Go out to MA to visit Rachael, Nikki, and Dani.
Visit my parents up at camp.
Hang with friends.
Make a gift for Kizzy, who has a bday coming up.
Do more beading projects
And clean my disaster of a room.

...I won't be bored I guess. D: